Letter to my children: Thank You Notes Ripples vs Cultural Etiquette

Letter to my children: Thank You Notes Ripples vs Cultural Etiquette


“Okay, my loves. Before we play with our new games today we need to write thank you notes.”

Here it comes.

Bean collapsed onto a chair. “Moooommmm, I hate writing thank you notes. No one else has to do it. We never get them from anyone else.”

Right, it is not so often that I have such a clear choice of passing along the snarky judgements of my mother or choosing a more generous interpretation.* Think think.

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Letter to Dragon: Hand Puppets

Letter to Dragon: Hand Puppets

“Which one is the easiest one for you to teach Momma?”

“Jackson - the bullfrog.”

“Jackson, not Jeremy - the normal frog?”

“Jackson.” Immediately, Dragon moves both hands and holds them up for me. “This is Jackson.” He then untwisted his hands and slows down his finger movement as he narrated along for me to follow him.

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Letter to Dragon: Tx u For Yuer Splng

Letter to Dragon: Tx u For Yuer Splng

Dearest Dragon,

Your lovely teacher quickly realized (though she never called me out on it directly) that I had been coddling you with spelling words when we were homeschooling. I would spell out the words you wanted to write. I took away your ability to try - by spoon feeding you the correct spelling.

Mrs P., very quickly nipped that in the bud (glorious woman). Over the course of a month or so she weaned you away from such hand holding and you are now forging ahead with writing regardless of accuracy. (Hooray Mrs P!)

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Letter to my children: Limbic Hijacking

Letter to my children: Limbic Hijacking

The bus squeals as it comes to a stop at the end of our road. I am clutching the mail for the day. Dragon, hops off the bus and proudly announced. “Momma, I made it to level six!”

Is he talking about the computer game? “That is so exciting, level six of what?”

“Mooom, of Gravity Run!”

You are SEVEN! Your brain is barely functioning. Why are you playing video games at school?!

“Of course! Congratulations!”

“My goal is to get to level 20.”

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Letter to my children: Safeguarding childhood

Dearest Beloveds,

Gone are the days of midnight feedings and chasing you around the kitchen - more physically taxing situations. Now I seem to spend a lot of time with mental situations. Where I need to figure out how much to share about the bigger world around you. It feels more and more that my job is less to tickle you and more to act as a buffer for your curiosity and fears as we enter the big world together.

Questions such as “How much does this cost?”

“Do we have enough money?”

“What are you all talking about?”

I don’t want to burden you with things like taxes and the minutea of your Mother’s health shenanigans. I also don’t want to lie to you.

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Letter to my children: Technology will not save us

Letter to my children: Technology will not save us

Dearest Beloveds,

When I was in my early tweens I came home from school after a parent presentation from Senator Al Gore about the J curve and global warming.*

I was very upset and Baba took me on a walk. “Dad! There are too many people on this planet and not enough resources! Did you know there is trash in the ocean? There is rain that has so much acid in it that statues are MELTING!”

I remember him taking a deep breath and turning to me. “Don’t worry, Corinna, technology will save us.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, there are very smart people out there who are working on this now and it will be okay.”

My beloveds, I am never going to tell you that technology will save us from the mess we have made on our Mother: the Earth.

There are three reasons why: 1) the physical needs of technology directly harm the earth 2) technology separates us from the present moment 3) technology is the latest iteration of human supremacy that created the schism in the first place.

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Letter to my children: How to model safe rule-breaking

Letter to my children: How to model safe rule-breaking

Backpacks were shrugged off as we reached the end of the gravel lane. Bean declared to her brother, “I look on the left - you look on the right.”

“I always look right!”

Let’s stop this before it balloons. I interjected, “I will look both ways too,” and waded onto the domed center of the asphalt road. High stepping with the thrill of illicit I called out as I scanned the horizons for cars. “Why is it so much fun to go into the road?”

The crickets sang to us from the tree line.

“Because it is cheating!” A big grin split Dragon’s face.

I laughed. “It is cheating.”

He continued, “because you are breaking the law and nobody knows!”

“I hear a car, let’s go back to the side. Don’t run.”

We have a long stretch of straight road on either side of our lane where we need to meet the bus. At least half a mile on either side keeps us safe during the slow traffic times in the morning.

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Letter to my children: Rich vs Wealthy

Letter to my children: Rich vs Wealthy

Dearest Beloveds, as the two of you navigate the world of capitalism and your own want monsters - I want to reiterate a thought.

I just read Morgan Housel’s The Psychology of Money:Timeless lessons on wealth, greed, and happiness. My key takeaways are threefold:

#1 Compounding interest does its magic only if you give it enough time.

#2 The unexpected will happen and your life goals will shift.

#3 It is preferable to be wealthy than rich.

All three of these are important to grok as you grow. The first is a mathematical fact. The second is common sense.* It is the last nugget I want to expand.

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Letter to my children: Indoctrinating Capitalism and Driving Lessons

Letter to my children: Indoctrinating Capitalism and Driving Lessons

“Dragon, I am not paying for you to play with the digging tool. I am paying you to weed.” Argh, I do not like that sentence. Boss Woman Hat doesn’t feel good. But - I am paying him and he is faffing and he needs to learn this.

“Okaaaayyyy.” Halfhearted swipes recommenced.

I look over at his pile. Corinna, he is 7. Do not compare his pile with your pile. “Dearest, if you want to do something else. I understand.”

“No! I want the sword! We figured it out. I work an hour for four days and I will have enough to buy it with my own money.”

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Homesteading Middles: Dirty Feet on Chicken Salad = Recycling

Homesteading Middles: Dirty Feet on Chicken Salad = Recycling

“Momma, are you ready for FULL ATTACK?!”

“What does that mean?”

“It means I am going to go in there and BE VICIOUS!”

“Okay, Dragon, go in there and be vicious - let’s see what happens.”

In November, we planted winter greens in the greenhouse. Hesitant to glean too much, we were very judicious in our harvesting. Suddenly March brought a few days in the 70s and the greenhouse went into overdrive. A good lesson from Mother Nature - gorge while you can.

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Letter to my children: Fire Fishing and Wood Ticks

Letter to my children: Fire Fishing and Wood Ticks

Dragon, you have been dealing with palate expanding to encourage your tiny baby teeth to leave. As a result, there is an entire list of dos and don’ts of food allowances on the fridge. Sometimes your mouth is too sore to even contemplate the oh so finely shaved carrots and apples. You, all on your own, nailed the solution: Fire Fishing with Apples. (Ahem, the official name of course.)

“Momma, what I want to do is to roast an apple in the woodstove to make it soft.”

“Oh, dearest, not inside the house. It is warm enough that we could make a bonfire outside and you could do it there?”

A pause, a contemplative look, a shrug. “Sure.”

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