Letter to my children: Privilege and Poodle English

Dearest Beloveds,

We are going to dive in right away with a quote from Vershawn Ashanti Young’s amazing article entitled Should Writer’s Use They Own English?:

Cultural critic Stanley Fish come talking bout - in his three-piece New York Times “What Should Colleges Teach?” suit - there only one way to speak and write to get ahead in the world, that writin teachers should “clear [they] mind of the orthodoxies that have taken hold in the composition world” (“Part 3”). He say don’t no student have a rite to they own language if that language them them “vulnerable to prejudice”; that “it may be try that the standard language is […] a device for protecting the status quo, but that very truth is a reason for teaching it to students’ (Fish “Part 3”).

Lord, lord, lord! Where do I begin, cuz this man sho tryin to take the nation back to a time when we were less tolerant of linguistic and racial differences. Yeah, I said racial difference, tho my man Stan be talkin explicitly bout language differences. The two be intertwined… But dont nobody’s language, dialect, or style make them “vulnerable to prejudice.” It’s ATTITUDES. It be the way folks with some power perceive other people’s language…

He prolly unaware that he be supportin language discrimination, cuz he appeal to its acceptable form - standard language ideology also called “dominant language ideology” (Lippi-Green). Standard language ideology is the belief that there is one set of dominant language rules that stem from a single dominant discourse (like standard English) that all writers and speakers of English must conform to in order to communicate effectively….*

Your mother, dearest ones, has been thoroughly steeped, stewed, and surrounded by the “dominant language rules.” From childhood I have been groomed to be comfortable with a dialect of English that is considered Standard American English (so much so that a part of me is physically uncomfortable when confronted with, what I consider, mistakes)..** That, children, is an example of privilege.

My loves, Standard American English (or “the King’s English”) is utilized in academia and professional settings. These settings are historically the domain of wealthy white men - hence the privilege. The hallowed walls of academia keep out many more people than they welcome in - and those walls are not just physically ivy-covered, they are walls constructed of grammar rules and vocabulary.

So here we are homeschooling a Second Grader (hello Bean). In second grade the curricula dictates that you write. A lot. Summaries of stories, descriptions of events, creative flights of fancy, comparisons… words words words. Capitalization, verb and subject agreement, dangling participles, adverbs vs adjectives, sentence structure, paragraph structure…all the scaffolding upon which phrases soar and swoop is being unveiled and unpacked.

We end up having conversations like this.

“Momma, I want to write “Chirpy Cricket do live in the orchard.””

“No, that is not going to work. You could write, “Chripy Cricket does live in the orchard” or “Chirpy Cricket lives in the orchard” but there is no such verb as “do live".”

“Says who?”

“Those who decide what counts as acceptable writing in school.”

“I don’t believe you. Why are they in charge? Says who?”

“Okay, I hear that. But in the meantime, let’s refocus on writing this sentence. What do you choose to write?

“Chirpy Cricket do live in the orchard.”

“Bean, that is not going to work.”

“WHY NOT?”

Honestly my love, in my memory this conversation lasted for hours. You dug in, I dug in. It was not one of my finest parenting moments. So the next day, I tried a different tack.

“Dearest, remember yesterday when we had the kerfuffle over the verb choice of “be live” vs “live.””

“Yes, and I still don’t understand…”

“Bean, I know you don’t. You don’t understand because it makes no sense. I get that. So this is what we are going to do. We are going to write our summary today however you want to write it. The verbs and the subjects don’t have to agree. You don’t have to capitalize anything.”

You started to glow as I listed what we wouldn’t be doing. “Really? I can write however I want?”

“Yes, for today. We will do this once in a while for fun. Also, we are going to start calling the rules of school writing “Poodle English” after our Poodle grammar books. It is important for you to learn “Poodle English” so that you can function in school and beyond. But I do want you to understand that “Poodle English” is just like me telling you to take your elbows off the table when we eat so you know how to behave if a queen ever invites you to tea. There are certain behaviors and ways of functioning in this world that are utilized by one group of people to exclude another group of people - and I want you not to be excluded, but I also want you to see such rules are arbitrary and often discriminatory. Does any of this make sense?”

“Not really.”

“Yea, I get that. I will keep on saying it. So, what do you want to write?”

Who knows what academic writing will be acceptable by the time you two are forging through high school essays. Perhaps it will be the “code-meshing” exemplified in Dr. Young’s essay above - we shall see. All I can say for sure at this point is that homeschooling is way more thought-provoking than I ever anticipated. Thank goodness I get to do it with two of my favorite people in the whole wide world.

I love watching you Bean as your brain works and your wheels turn - grasping new concepts and successfully acing assessments. Dragon, it will be your turn soon.

*The auto correct on the freaking computer made it difficult for me to even write out this quote - reminding me of when I was writing my papers on Medieval Literature - WHICH IS EXACTLY THE POINT. (ahem)

**Thank you Eckart Tolle for the phrase. I confess I cringe when I hear a “good” vs “well” or “where is the milk at.” My bodily response (as unflattering as it may be for me to admit) tells me it is not only intellectually I am steeped in this discourse. It is part of my sense of self. What is even more of wrinkle children for your Momma is when I realized that it only makes me cringe when I hear someone say it whom I feel (yes, Tolle, judgements of the ego) should know better - like your father. Because in essence what happens when your father says something grammatically incorrect my ego mind gets affronted because I feel that reflects poorly on me. Woof. Unpacking the ego is the work of a lifetime beloveds, but it is never too early to start.