Letter to my children: Safeguarding childhood

Dearest Beloveds,

Gone are the days of midnight feedings and chasing you around the kitchen - more physically taxing situations. Now I seem to spend a lot of time with mental situations. Where I need to figure out how much to share about the bigger world around you. It feels more and more that my job is less to tickle you and more to act as a buffer for your curiosity and fears as we enter the big world together.

Questions such as “How much does this cost?”

“Do we have enough money?”

“What are you all talking about?”

I don’t want to burden you with things like taxes and the minutea of your Mother’s health shenanigans. I also don’t want to lie to you.

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Letter to my children: Technology will not save us

Letter to my children: Technology will not save us

Dearest Beloveds,

When I was in my early tweens I came home from school after a parent presentation from Senator Al Gore about the J curve and global warming.*

I was very upset and Baba took me on a walk. “Dad! There are too many people on this planet and not enough resources! Did you know there is trash in the ocean? There is rain that has so much acid in it that statues are MELTING!”

I remember him taking a deep breath and turning to me. “Don’t worry, Corinna, technology will save us.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, there are very smart people out there who are working on this now and it will be okay.”

My beloveds, I am never going to tell you that technology will save us from the mess we have made on our Mother: the Earth.

There are three reasons why: 1) the physical needs of technology directly harm the earth 2) technology separates us from the present moment 3) technology is the latest iteration of human supremacy that created the schism in the first place.

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Letter to my children: How to model safe rule-breaking

Letter to my children: How to model safe rule-breaking

Backpacks were shrugged off as we reached the end of the gravel lane. Bean declared to her brother, “I look on the left - you look on the right.”

“I always look right!”

Let’s stop this before it balloons. I interjected, “I will look both ways too,” and waded onto the domed center of the asphalt road. High stepping with the thrill of illicit I called out as I scanned the horizons for cars. “Why is it so much fun to go into the road?”

The crickets sang to us from the tree line.

“Because it is cheating!” A big grin split Dragon’s face.

I laughed. “It is cheating.”

He continued, “because you are breaking the law and nobody knows!”

“I hear a car, let’s go back to the side. Don’t run.”

We have a long stretch of straight road on either side of our lane where we need to meet the bus. At least half a mile on either side keeps us safe during the slow traffic times in the morning.

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Letter to my children: Rich vs Wealthy

Letter to my children: Rich vs Wealthy

Dearest Beloveds, as the two of you navigate the world of capitalism and your own want monsters - I want to reiterate a thought.

I just read Morgan Housel’s The Psychology of Money:Timeless lessons on wealth, greed, and happiness. My key takeaways are threefold:

#1 Compounding interest does its magic only if you give it enough time.

#2 The unexpected will happen and your life goals will shift.

#3 It is preferable to be wealthy than rich.

All three of these are important to grok as you grow. The first is a mathematical fact. The second is common sense.* It is the last nugget I want to expand.

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Letter to my children: Indoctrinating Capitalism and Driving Lessons

Letter to my children: Indoctrinating Capitalism and Driving Lessons

“Dragon, I am not paying for you to play with the digging tool. I am paying you to weed.” Argh, I do not like that sentence. Boss Woman Hat doesn’t feel good. But - I am paying him and he is faffing and he needs to learn this.

“Okaaaayyyy.” Halfhearted swipes recommenced.

I look over at his pile. Corinna, he is 7. Do not compare his pile with your pile. “Dearest, if you want to do something else. I understand.”

“No! I want the sword! We figured it out. I work an hour for four days and I will have enough to buy it with my own money.”

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Letter to my Children: Travel Thoughts

Letter to my Children: Travel Thoughts

Dearest beloveds,

The fun thing about where we live is that very different places are within half a days drive. For one week north to visit a different country, a new city, and practice another language. For another week southeast to eat freshly shucked oysters, watch sea birds, and do puzzles when it rained. Back to back. As my dear friend E said, This sounds like one of those ideas that seemed perfect in December.

Be that as it may, it has given your mother ample time in the car to contemplate travel: why people do it, the point of it, and the different tourist modalities.

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Letter to my Children: Parenthood can be Quite Humbling

Letter to my Children: Parenthood can be Quite Humbling

Dearest Beloveds,

Parenthood can be quite humbling.*

One of the most confronting parts of being a parent is realizing you are passing down your neuroses/limitations/Cranky Monster baggage to your children.

Many teachers over many years have all taught me the same thing. We are energetic beings in physical bodies. Our energy body/aura surrounds us like a glowing multidimensional egg of vibrational me-ness.

In that aura there can be blockages. Blockages made of past habits, memories, things that trigger us, woundings, fears, etc etc. Rob Wergin likes to call them mud pies. Mucky, dark, heavy glurpy goo that sticks within our aura and blocks energy flow. Meme told me when I was 12 that 4th dimensional creatures live in our auras - called in as helpers when we are afraid or in pain but then they never leave and become a handicap.* Perhaps those two are the same thing.

I spend a great deal of energy and attention cleaning up my personal mudpies - but sometimes I think I splash mud onto you two when I am not thinking.

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Letter to my children: Motivation, Rewards, why Zingermans (Visioning) Rocks

Letter to my children: Motivation, Rewards, why Zingermans (Visioning) Rocks

Dearest Beloveds,

I recently ran across an interview with Dr. Tony Nader and Daniel Pink about motivations and rewards. Your Momma was cringing as I listened to their discussion because it dawned on me that all day long I am offering you contingent rewards. As Pink calls them, an “if then” reward.

“If you don’t eat your breakfast we can’t go to camp.”

“If you don’t set the table, I will dock you one strike. As you know, after three strikes you won’t get your allowance.”

“If you don’t do you math lesson, we can’t read stories.”

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Letter to my children: The Teachings of the School Bus

Letter to my children: The Teachings of the School Bus

Dearest Beloveds,

The school bus - both incredibly useful and also a huge teaching tool. Who knew?

When we have time, it is joy to meander down the road, looking at the autumn olives and the late blooming iris (poor thing, right before the frost hits). We hold hands. I sing Waltzing Matilda…

“Down came the squatter, mounted on his thoroughbred. Up came the trouperrrrsssss!” I hold the note and look over at the two of you, - perhaps I give your hands a squeeze.

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Letter to Dragon: "My father broke my arm"

“Look at you. That is some cast. How did that happen?”

Dragon, loud and clear, “My father broke my arm.”

Wait what!? Dragon!

The parking attendant’s face froze. I interjected quickly. “Dragon, your father did not break your arm.”

Indignation retorted loudly, “yes, he did! He hit it with a ball!”

Arrgggghhh

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