Letter to my children: When the country mice visit DC

Dearest Beloveds,

Your Momma has always been a bit of a snob about being raised in Washington DC. Not outside the Beltway, not for me. Capitol Hill, thank you very much. (Such a fun ego surge as I write that.)

And now we are raising you two children in the country.

The country - where you can take a walk by the moonlight. Where frogs crawl up the glass of the doors and meet us in the morning. Where our closest neighbors are barely within earshot. Where hawks circle overhead, apples are picked, cherry juice stains chins, baby turkeys are held, and sheep are fed – bare feet and naked in the summer and bundled in the winter.

For four months we have been planning a celebration of Baba’s life – and as his life was in DC until four years ago, to Washington DC we went.

It was wonderful to be in my hometown as a tourist.

There were several things that were the same. The smell of the Metro. Feeling as though the National Zoo was the biggest longest walk ever. I was hoping my memory of the hill at the Zoo was exaggerated.  It was not. Nor was my unhappiness with the size of the snake cages (If an animal is 20 feet long, please zookeepers of the world, allow said animal the chance to stretch out to their full length.) Loving the Natural History Museum – learned that mammals need not just hair and milk production – but also special ear bones!

There were many things that were different. Rental scooters were strewn all over downtown sidewalks. The Eastern Market has blossomed into more outdoor seating where the parking lot used to live. There were more barricades up and around federal buildings – don’t know if this was due to the times in general or the protest scheduled for Sept 18th.

Your Momma also saw the city through a whole new set of eyes. Your eyes. Seeing that led to such comments as this.

“You need to close the curtains when you are changing. I know you want to see the people working in their offices, 15 feet from us, but it is better if they don’t see you naked.”

“No, you cannot pee behind this bush. We need to find an inside toilet.”

“That person is sleeping on the floor because he does not have a home right now and he wants to be out of the weather. Don’t stare. It is considered impolite.”

“No, we are not going to buy you a scooter.”

“I hear you that it smells stinky here. But please don’t yell EWWWW. Cities have a lot of people all living together in a small amount of space, sometimes things get smelly.”

“No, you cannot take your shoes off in the playground. There might be broken glass.” Or needles, or human feces, or or.

“You must be within 5 feet of me at all time when we are in a crowd. That means you either hold my hand or I am looking directly at you.”

“Children, please stop jumping onto the floor – there are people sleeping below us. Nor may you run in the hallways.” 

So many “nos” and “stops” and “be carefuls”… hopefully tempered by some of these.

“Yes! You can push the button for the elevator. Dragon, you pushed the outside button and that means that Bean, you push the inside button.”

“Yes! We can ride the escalator and the Metro!”

“Yes! You can run around and yell on the grass of the Mall.”

“Yes! We can get a treat of ice cream and watch the gorillas swing above us.” Thank goodness for that ice-cream – strategically placed halfway up the Zoo hill.

“Yes! We can go on another escalator!”

“Bean, you do your MetroCard. Good. Now Dragon, you go and Momma will scoot in right behind you. Well done!” 

“Yes! You can take your clothing off and run around the water playground in your underpants with your sandals on. Dada brought a towel and a change of clothing for you.” 

“Yes, you can run away from me.” This playground has a wall with one entry so all I need to do is to monitor the entry.

Whew. We made it. You both now know how to walk on the left on an escalator (not just stand on the right). How to swipe a card on a machine to make doors open. How to stand and wait for people to get on and off of an elevator. How to say “excuse me” when you need to walk by a group of grown-ups.

Whether any of these learnings stick, who knows. But the first ripples have been initiated.

The important thing my dearest children is to feel comfortable everywhere. A lot of that has to do with being comfortable with yourself and it is also important to be curious and humble when somewhere new. Learn from the natives. Be quiet as you observe. Be kind. No matter where you are – love is everywhere.

I love you both so much. Thank you for showing me my hometown.