Letter to my children: Axes and Extinction

Dearest Beloveds,

It has been a while since I wrote because we have been all over the place in terms of doings. Our RV trip to NM, your Dad taking off time for us to split wood, our first trip on an airplane in 2 years… the past two months seem to have flown by.

And here we are, the glory of spring has passed and it is now summer weather. The ants are looking for water and coolness. Dragon, you were sitting on the stairs this morning as I came in from checking in on Meme.

“Momma, there is an ant on the wall.”

“Is it a carpenter ant?”

“No, it is almost medium. Not big.”

Almost medium, what a perfect size for an ant.

“Dragon, why are you wearing trousers? It is going to be really warm today.”

“I am wearing trousers because I want to use my axe and my saw.” Ah yes, the axe, how in the world does one teach a four year old to use an axe safely? Other than watching you and making you wear shoes and trousers. You are so SO happy with your burgeoning abilities and the way the chips fly. Besides it is usually 20 seconds of chopping and then you tell me you need to take a little rest. Baba’s official scouting axe resting at your side as you you take a drink or sit or stand there breathing hard, then, back at it again for a bit.

“You are getting so good with your axe!”

“I know Momma, I am practicing.”

Later, we were sitting in the dining room and I am talking to your father about getting pillows for the bench. “Darling, let us measure the bench, there used to be a tape measure in the drawer, but you know how those seem to walk away.”

Dragon, you look up from your yogurt, “I know where one is!”

“You do!” I look over with a pretend incredulous face, thinking to myself Of course you knows where one is, you are the one that moves them all over the house every time you dismantle a drawer.

“There is one in the playroom drawer. Just dig down deep and you will find it.”

So dig down deep we did and there it was!

I am doing a cleaning and clearing and purging of the house, books, clothing, stuff… mostly focused on Baba’s patrimony. I have taken down the framed lace on the walls. I have unearthed the cheetah fur and parakeet stuffed hat. I have pulled out the mah jong set made of ivory and the fans of ostrich feathers. All of these remnants of a time with a population convinced the planet was theirs for the taking.

Just in time to have a conversation with the Bean about what it means when an animal is extinct.

We were driving into the village and I was pointing out the beaver dam across from the big heart on the hill. “I want to learn more about beavers!” The Bean calls out.

“Well, it is a good thing we are going to the library.”

……

“Do you have any reference books on beavers?”

“Honestly, our reference section is much smaller than it used to be, because so much is online.”

But they did have this glorious huge book listing all of the animals on the planet. (I write this and I wonder, really? ALL of the animals? seems rather hubristic… shall we say, all of the animals we know about.) The book has about 3 inches devoted to each animal and in the heading section with the picture it says status and one of the categories is facing extinction.

Bean, you were trying your darndest to sound out the word, “Eettttnnniiii”

“Do you need help?”

“Yes.”

“That word is extinction. It means that there are very few of the animals left on the planet and we need to do our best to protect them.”

“Why are there so few?”

Oh my gosh, here it is, the first conversation. The beginning of her understanding that our environment and animals are under stress from human expansion and overconsumption. Deep breath. “There are so few for a variety of reasons, mostly because humans hunted too many or the animals lost there homes because humans expanded into their territory and took away their food sources. For example, this is the whale page, look how many of these are almost extinct. That is because before electricity humans used whale fat for lamps.”

Bean, you look at me, “That is really sad. Those poor whales.”

“I know darling, those poor whales. The humans at the time thought there would always be more whales, but well, not so much.”

You keep on looking at the pictures, then you look up at me. Here we go, more questions about extinction.

“Momma, can we have cheesy bread for lunch?”

I love you so much beloveds, thank you for being my children. Seeing the world through your eyes is such a treat.